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31 October 2018 @ 10:58 am
_Hunting Magic_part 6  
Big question. Does Eldon show up again? If so, he only gets to do half the heroics.

Here’s a brief take on Prissy to the rescue:

(3) So, if the Bad Guys are staying in town, that means . . .  Air head survey of every male in sight, rating their likelihood of being the Bad Guys. Lots of wrong kind of bad Guys. But it's hard to believe that tall handsome fellow could be Bad. Flirting disaster.

(4) She rents a cabin with a corral, goes and gets Zeus. Now she can ride all over, looking at the more remote areas. She hits every real estate place in town for lists of rental property. Starts a survey that way. Runs out of energy.

(5) Feds show up, ask why she thinks this is the right area. Asks why she thinks the Bad Guys are still here.

         "What they said – 'he'll come for you' – it seemed to me that they were bait for a trap. They want Eldon. I suppose they could know some other World where he lives. But then why bother with us at all?"

         "And your Eldon said they tracked down magic." He patted the horse absently. "Unless the horse can do magic, and make them come to us, we're stuck."

         Zeus bobbed his head and pawed, striking a spark off the rocks.

(5) Bad Guys come, tracking the horse's magic, the fed clips his recorder to the horse's mane and they run away and hide. Bad guys decamp, the other feds are following them. Hawkins gets the recorder and they replay the conversation. Then they find someone who speaks both German and Russian, and get it translated. The Drei have the bait through a Gate, and they will go there and check them, and open the Gate at midnight.

(6) Prissy asks the horse if he can make himself invisible. He nods.

         "And a rider?" Nod. "Good, let's go find this gate, jump through, grab Tiff and Brian, and run for it." Nod.

         Hawkins crossed his arms stubbornly.

         "Two riders?"


         "Are you insane?"

         "No. Just desperate. How many of your guys can sneak in too?"

(7) Sneak through interior maze with oversized horse. Find the bait and run/fight their way out. Prissy's shield deflects the lasers, the gun she bought was gag gift, as they find out when a cyborg grabs it and shoots her with it. While the cyborg gawps at the American flag and tinny national anthem, she scrambles away. Zeus tromps the Cyborg, she climbs on and they run for it. As fast as they can, which is faster than they should; they run into a bunch of cyborgs. Zeus hits the brakes, slides on the cloth hoof covers, sounds like a six car pileup on the freeway. A few kicks to silence the still active and they run off again, hear the lightning spitting and head for it. They run up on the cyborgs manning the killing ground in front of the gate and stomp all over them. The Feds take out the rest, they all run for the Gate, jumping through as it starts to close.

         The Feds and the scientists are moving into a closed Army facility there, in case the Cyborgs return. They want Tiffany, Brian, Prissy and Zeus in protective custody, elsewhere.

         "Elsewhere?" Prissy raised her eyebrows (newly plucked and shaped). "But if they are tracking magic they'll come for us wherever. If you want them to come here, we should be here. Ahem. I am an excellent secretary. Offer me a job. I'd be delighted to move here, with my horse."

         Tiffany was cuddled up to Brian. "I cut hair. Now that my breath is back to normal. I could get a job here in town."

         Brian scowled. "I'm supposed to be cramming for the Bar Exam. Once I manage that – if I can remember a damned thing after the last month – I could open shop here. If they're coming for me, I'd just as soon have a bunch of gun slinging federal agents around."

         Prissy beamed at Cliff. "There now, won't that be ever so much easier than trying to coerce us into hiding somewhere?"

         He closed his eyes as if he had a head ache. "Yes. The main drawback is that it will put you in close proximity to the Cyborgs if they ever return."

ekuah on October 31st, 2018 09:44 pm (UTC)
Maybe not Eldon...
...but some of the D-Cops.

Or just for once the Empire of the One could give a hand.

My guess is, that Eldon just don't have enough manpower to fight of a cyborg army.

Ebsa, Ra'd, Rael and some of the other good Oners could be send in with some Fallen.

Hawkins: "We don't need help from a giggling teenage punk"
Ra'd: "Oh, well. If you think so. But just as a friendly hint. Never call Rael by those names. She is, by the way, a trained assassin and around 60 now."
(Anonymous) on October 31st, 2018 10:33 pm (UTC)
Agree, kind of. Eldon's part could be alerting Xen or Fean, since he can't take on a whole army. This gets him out of the story's way for a while. He has to do something to help, being the God of Heroes, Prissy is so hooked on him she could probably summon him. She wants a bad guy boyfriend. How does he react?

Using Fean as a contact would get One involved. Team 13 rides again plus extras, including a full compass! They have experience living behind enemy lines. Possibly add an Action Team or members of the One. I'd imagine the One would be very interested in the empire of the cyborgs, especially if some Oner gets borged.

It might be a good rallying call to get multiple worlds interested in a common threat. Arboria might be interested in helping, as they have taken down their own malicious bad guys.
ekuah on October 31st, 2018 11:00 pm (UTC)
Yeah, this story could be a good rallying point to gather all the good guys.
And leaving the feds in a constant state of puzzlement.

Hawkins: "Okay, you said that there were some unusual visitors coming through that glowing arc? "
Fed:"Yes, beside some guys and gals in uniforms there was a guy with huge guns, a redheaded punk, a black goat, a few really hot babes, two dragons and some zombie cowboys."
"Erm,... what? Come again"
(Anonymous) on November 14th, 2018 01:21 am (UTC)
God of Heros?
I know that Fean thinks he is, but from his actions it is closer to God of Children. Every time he does something heroic is is to protect children. It is like he is every child's special forces uncle. Perhaps his title could be "The Man from Uncle"?
(Anonymous) on October 31st, 2018 11:21 pm (UTC)
What's the information Source?
If Eldon doesn't show, then you need to show a lot of information gathering. Even foolhardy heroics need *something* to instigate it.

So Zeus is smart and can do lots - it's possible he can provide enough info for the "plan" to develop, but I find it hard to believe that just nodding and stamping a foot would be enough. maybe find some way to spell words? At least need to show overcoming disbelief.

Um, "Prissy's shield"??? a laser reflector? Oh, the previous post had her buy a shield for Eldon. Maybe it will sound better in a continuous flow, but it seems out of place. what makes her think to actually put it between her and a cyborg? Is this world familiar with laser weapons? as a real weapon instead of just movie magic? I suppose you can use a laser that emits visible light (not required) and the beam shows up in a fog or something.

I sorta feel you are reaching for a story end, with Tiffany and Brian rescued, but to me, this feels like only the beginning.

If the cyborgs are focused on Eldon, then this is a sideline. If they are distracted enough to really follow Zeus, then they're coming back in more force. And, it means they have a really good magic detector, that not even Disco or Cometfall seem to have. Maybe you can do something to show the actual limits of the magic detection, and why they might be distracted by Zeus instead of Eldon?

mbarkermbarker on November 1st, 2018 12:11 am (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
Somewhere we were idly musing about the horses manipulating bubbles and other dimensional phenomena... what if Zeus likes to play with the cones and bubbles and cylinders and whatnot -- what if he makes Klein bottles out of bubbles! -- and that dimensional activity is what is drawing the attention of the cyborgs? Actually, I wonder what happens if you make a Klein bottle out of a bubble or cylinder?
matapampamuphoff on November 1st, 2018 12:52 am (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
This is just a quick sketch, an outline in prose.

The sequence of Cyborg stories and Eldon will start with the Roman Empire World. I suspect it will involve Eldon tracing the gate connections back to the junction where the Roman World and a dozen others are connected with the rest of the empire. He'll use one of the two small dimension bombs on the connecting world, then it's party time to see what the Wine of the Gods will do to mess up Cyborgs as it tries to heal them (this being a recently exploited clump of worlds, the cyborged natives are rarely telepathic.) Or that was the plan, but plenty of Intel got out, about the Super Mentalist who successfully fought the Drei.

This is why the Cyborgs are tracking Eldon down.

Meanwhile, in a different branch of the Cyborg Imperium, Utopia happened, and now Xen has encountered them. The Oners are also spying on the Cyborgs, with some cooperation with Disco.

At this point, I'm not sure if Eldon is going to have a role in the Big Cyborg Book.
ekuah on November 1st, 2018 06:53 am (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
What was Eldon's travel sequence?

Lodge in the mountains
(acquiring the bombs)

Last Merge
(separation from Rior)
(blowing up the miniverse)

Mall Santa

Saturday Night Part 1
(wreaking havoc)

Nowhere Man
(Eldon establish something like a home)

(contact with the Drei Mächte Bündnis)

Now, the cyborgs were already hunting Eldon through:
Mall Santa 2 (unpublished)
Saturday night 1

That's makes no sense if he just popped up on their radar in 'Serpent'.

Or you have to rearrange the story sequence and send Eldon skidding through the multiverse again at the end of 'Serpent'
matapampamuphoff on November 1st, 2018 10:49 pm (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
This is why Mall Santa and Saturday Night have no series numbers. Try this:

Lodge in the Mountains
(acquiring the bombs)

Last Merge
(separation from Rior)
(blowing up the miniverse)

Nowhere Man
(Eldon establish something like a home)

Super Star
(Eldon back in touch with the Hors, and talking with the authorities about dimensional travel)

(contact with the Drei Mächte Bündnis, lopping off a whole branch with an amazing weapon, and rousing the higher levels to hunt him down and get that weapon.)

Mall Santa

Saturday Night Part 1
(wreaking havoc)
ekuah on November 2nd, 2018 07:45 am (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
My guess was based on the Eldon's health condition.

Last Merge: Eldon nearly blowing up himself
Mall Santa: Eldon is barely coherent
Saturday Night: Eldon is basically healed

To make your timeline plausible, he has to blow himself up again.
Or has to at least suffer something that explains all those uncontrolled (skidding) reentries.

Hopefully the Cyborgs won't attack the 'Nowhere Man' & 'Super Star' world.
(which would be logical if the Drei Mächte Bündnis is searching for him)
matapampamuphoff on November 2nd, 2018 01:28 pm (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?
Don't worry, Eldon will get injured again.
(Anonymous) on November 5th, 2018 12:59 am (UTC)
Re: What's the information Source?

(Anonymous) on November 1st, 2018 03:11 am (UTC)
This book could provide a solid way for oners to find out about cyborgs via Fean. Then Rael's cyborg encounters and Xen's rescue of her, don't seem such a random coincidence.