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23 April 2016 @ 08:22 am
_Super Star_  
  Surely you've seen this Eldon story?

         The old man was tough and rugged, and put up a good fight. They threw each other around the store, shelves crashing to the floor, various things flying. He stepped on a can that rolled and went flying. The old geezer dropped a shelf on him and he was trapped, watching in helplessly as the old man grabbed the last stick of Sahara Deodorant and marched triumphantly off to pay for it. Eldon slumped in despair.

         "Cut!" The director beamed. "Excellent! Call it a wrap and let's do lunch!"

         G., who insisted on the initial, with period, as a name, tossed the deodorant into the rest of the mess, and the crew closed in, this time with boxes to take everything away, instead of remake the store for another shot.

         "Got the script for 'The Falls' yet?"

         Eldon shook his head. "I'm going by this afternoon to pick it up. How bad is it?"

         "Hideous. Jack thinks so too. I think we need to work it over, then go see the writer."

         "Deal. I'll read it tonight. Jack free tomorrow?"

         "Yep. He said come up for lunch. Plan?"


         Evon Jamison, directing his third advertisement and wishing desperately for a movie, dropped all his directorial authority and listened avidly as G. shook his head in despair at their youth and regaled them both with tales of how Hollywood used to be run.

         Then Eldon drove four blocks to pick up the script, and then spent an hour going twenty-five miles to a modest townhouse with an incredible price tag.

         "Home sweet home." He parked the Mercedes back in its garage. He missed the corridor. He needed to get back to the big house and see what was happening. He phoned instead.

         A yawning Heso told him they'd apparently gotten away scot free, and not to worry so much. So he called Lily to let her know he was back in town, and would she like to join him for dinner? She would, and read the script over his shoulder.

         "It's a bit weak on plot, isn't it?" He wished he knew more about this world. "Why are the Atlanteans even there?"

         "In Uganda? That does seem odd. Now if they had a purpose, that would fill in the biggest plot hole. And then there's the matter of why the Archeologists are there. Why aren't they doing this in Egypt, so the Atlanteans could be after artifacts buried with one of the early Pharaohs? And the Archeologists would have an excuse to be there as well."

         "Maybe the Atlanteans have gotten the things they need and are looking for a new homeland? Is Uganda less populated than this Egypt?"

         "I think so. Hmm, the Atlanteans need a new home. However pretty, Uganda or Kenya are going to take some considerable capturing. On the other hand, if they were passing through on their way to Somalia . . . " She hauled him over to his computer and brought up a map, then an online encyclopedia.

         "Hmm, nine million people, vs almost 40 million., and distributed mainly in the south and this one city, Mogadishu?"

         "Right, and the whole country is in virtual anarchy. They could easily take over from a local warlord and start working up to controlling the whole country. So, if the tribe is traveling (looting, pillaging and kidnapping as they go.) If they encounter the Good Guys before they get to the Falls, that would give the Good Guys enough time to have their two loosing battles, and then their final victory for the physical resolution of the story to be at those incredibly gorgeous falls, like Jacob wants. The emotional closing could be their travel out of Kenya into Somalia." Lily flashed a grin. "Somalia is an extremely poor country, and best known internationally for its pirates. If the Director wanted to pull a switch in the last movie, and make the Atlantean's the heroes, he couldn't find a better place for them to take over."

        "They're ignoring a lot of opportunities for sexual frisson as well."

         "I don't think frisson is a word in this world, Eldon."

         "Sorry. But they've got the daughter and the young archeologist all cosy at the start, so there's no doubt about the ending. If the romance was less settled, maybe an argument, and she stomps off mad, going where she oughten and he follows, and the father follows, complaining loudly . . . that fills in the plot hole of why they were in such a stupid position in the first place."

         "An angry woman makes walking off into the desert logical?" She tried hard to frown instead of laugh at him.

         Eldon elevated his nose. "This Character, as written. Generally, men are the idiots who over reach their capabilities. For instance, if they hadn't chased, she have gone about ten feet beyond the reach of the firelight and sat down in a huff."

         "You must have the obnoxious little brother point that out."

         "Maybe they should kidnap him as well. He could become fast friends with one of the Atlantean kids, while I try my evil wiles on the Professor's daughter."

         "G.'s going to want a romantic interest."

         "I wonder if we could persuade him to do a comedic one? The caravan master's fat widowed sister and her five daughters? Something like that."

         She giggled. Marvelous sound. She was starting to glow, too. Those witch and wizard genes were integrating with her own. "Perhaps three mostly grown sons, very certain that G. is going to behave himself and honorably marry their mother?"

         "Ooo. You have a wicked imagination. So the emotional ending will be the Atlanteans escaping across the border to Somalia, and the Good Guys being stopped at the border. Jack and G. can fight over who gets to say something like if ever a country could be improved by those madmen, or something to that effect?"

         "Yeah. Or 'if a country ever deserved some mad men,' or 'a match made in hell.' Whatever."


         "We're from the government and we're here so you can help us."

         "C'mon in. Which branch of government and what sort of help do you need?"

         "We understand that you'll be traveling to Africa, shooting on location. If, of course, you sort out your . . . documentary difficulties."

         "Right, you're the part of government that likes to push people around. No sweat. Go ahead and pretend that a man who can travel between Worlds can't figure out how to take a dimensional short cut to wherever he wants to be." Eldon tried to give them his bright attentive student look.

         They scowled.

         He prodded again. "So, what may I do for my host government on this world, eh?"

         "You are going to be filming in a very dangerous part of the World. We want to send some people along to protect you."

         "Oy. No doubt taking notes all the way. Or something else equally nefarious. Why didn't you approach G. or Jack? Never mind, you had no holds on them, and applying to their patriotic and better selves never even occurred to you, did it?"

         "They are Hollywood actors. Therefore, they don't like the Federal law enforcement agencies."

         "Really? All the shooting and fighting Bad Guys and they don't salute the flag every morning? That's . . . a facet of their existence I hadn't noticed before. Huh." Eldon leaned back and thought that over. "How many people are you planning on sending? They're booked as far as speaking parts are concerned, and they usually just grab extras as they need them. Well, we're having a pre-shoot get together in the morning. I'll raise the possibility of bringing along a couple of bully boys, so we don't need to depend on the local government for protection."

         They eyed him suspiciously.

         "Tsk! Really, such suspicion. You lot have been so nice about not trying to deport me Gods know where, I feel all cozy and wanted. Therefore I'll help."

         "Thank you, Mr. Brown. We do appreciate willing co-operation. We just didn't expect it."

         "No sweat." Eldon glanced at his watch. "Now, how many people do you want to send, and how many do you absolutely consider the fewest? I'll try to suggest something in between."

         "We'd like to send a team of six. Two would be the least. I don't like the idea of one man without backup."

         "Right. You got a number I can reach you at, or will you just turn up on my doorstep again?"

         They smiled tightly, and left without specifying. Well, he knew all too well what he'd done to deserve this. So he went to bed and slept like a rock. His conscience knew better than to get between him and a good night's sleep.

Zan Lynxzlynx on April 23rd, 2016 01:29 pm (UTC)
More Eldon! Yay!
(Anonymous) on April 23rd, 2016 02:00 pm (UTC)
Always ready for more Eldon! The first story of yours i read on here was the onr that became Mall Santa. That led me to the Wine of the Gods, Lawyers, etc. I find him a fascinating character.
matapampamuphoff on April 23rd, 2016 04:53 pm (UTC)
Yep, the Bad Boy who turns into a hero. Fun to write, too. Uninhibited, spontaneous,and just enough morals to avoid the worst crimes.