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03 October 2017 @ 06:45 am
_Girl Trip_ or _Lucky Dave_ the end  
 

Rael kept back out of the way, not being a big fan of medical procedures, and kept track by ear as Xen worked over Lucky Dave, his brother with abdominal injuries, and finally a comatose Prophet with multiple broken ribs and a punctured lung. Listened to the prognosis—good for all three—smirked at the poleaxed expressions of a dozen doctors and medgicians.

Then she called Urfa, brief both him and the president, and was given permission to tell all to the Newsies.

Ryol jumped up all bright-eyed and headed for the hospital foyer.

After Rael's nice factual briefing and attempts to answer questions . . . she found that one canny newsie had nabbed Ryol and gotten the whole story from her. Stolen car and all.

"So, I expect your about ready to head home?" Newsie all toothy grin.

Ryol shook her head and bounced. "Oh heck no. I've got six more sites to check for lost Bags of the Prophets. No telling what we might find!"

Epilogue

Immediate:

"It's so nice to have a quiet house . . ." Raod snuggled up to her husband. "Half the number of children, a quarter the noise . . . " She broke off at the sound of running feet.

Raaz. Six years old! How time flies.

The girl galloped in. "Ryol's on the Screen! She rescued the Prophet Nicholas! There was a big fight in the hospital! Aunt Rael beat up this poor crippled guy!"

Little Ox was on her heels. "And there was a HAND!"

A year later:

Lucky Dave and Davos grabbed a table in the Black Horse Barracks common room.

"Well, at least Nick's talked those weirdos of Emre's down. Now if they'd just let go completely, admit that they just need to come together for the fortunately rare danger I could get over this creepy 'someone's watching me' feeling."

"Yeah. Not that I was the least bit nervous about Nick actually going there."

"Me neither. Not worried a bit." Lucky Dave grinned. "Since Isakson and Ra'd both went with him."



 
 
 
ekuah on October 3rd, 2017 12:50 pm (UTC)
Very brief ending.
Needs a little bit more flesh on the bones.

I am most curious what those three survivors think about that madhouse of multiverse they landed in.
Wine of the gods.
Old acquaintances of the prophets
Goat, bunny and sex change spells
Corridors
Other worlds (Including Dinos)
Disco and embassy
Magic house building
Dragons, Elves and Neandertals
Genetic changes and potions
just to mention a few

Maybe you can make a short story of it:
Nick, Dave and Davos get a tour of the multiverse by Ra'd and Nighthawk
"Oh by the way, do want to visit Moon or Mars in the meantime?"

Edited at 2017-10-03 12:51 pm (UTC)
Robert AllabandRobert Allaband on October 3rd, 2017 01:38 pm (UTC)
Re: Very brief ending.
Since Nick isn't tied up in that whole Hive-mind like Emre you would think he would like to see those he thought long lost, especially Wolfgang because it was he that taught all the Orange Team how to survive. If it wasn't for Wolfgang's teachings,"magic" or no, they wouldn't have survived very long. Then on top of that having his son tied to Wolfgang's Grandaughter...
matapampamuphoff on October 3rd, 2017 01:41 pm (UTC)
Re: Very brief ending.
That's why I refer to this series as a Soap Opera. There is no end. It appears to be immortal.

The problem with stories is that they have to have a problem.

When they go meet the other Tellies, something has to go seriously wrong.
(Anonymous) on October 3rd, 2017 03:57 pm (UTC)
RE: Re: Very brief ending.
Well, meeting the Hive Mind/confronting Emre would seem to be a potential problem. But I have another idea.

Nick and Charlie are the only Tellies (at this point) with normal brains and working memories. Charlie was with the Fallen tellies until the last possible moment, Nick wasn't, he missed a couple years of what happened back on Earth, that he'd be wanting to know about, including a number of people such as the folks who snuck off on the logging expedition.

Seems like there's a possible problem in "Whatever happened to AK?" that Nick would be uniquely positioned to ask, since he doesn't know she's dead, and a realization that wait a moment, maybe she isn't, maybe she was able to heal, and how do we infiltrate earth to find out? Charlie might also realize, but "AK got murdered" was probably delivered rather around the time that he reconnected with Rebecca and got lost in the general shock. Nick would be coming at the question colder and clearer, having had time to consider all the changes post-chat with Emre, before reminiscing with the other Tellies.

Coffee at Harry's Tavern with Charlie and the Old Gods would be the set-up for that story.

Holly
ekuah on October 3rd, 2017 05:22 pm (UTC)
Re: Very brief ending.
Please remind me.
Who was AK?
(Anonymous) on October 3rd, 2017 06:10 pm (UTC)
RE: Re: Very brief ending.
You need to reread Outcasts and Gods! Anna-Karinna, Wolfgang's mild and non-reciprocated romantic interest. Took a bullet meant for him after Charlie et al escaped.

Holly
ekuah on October 3rd, 2017 05:27 pm (UTC)
Re: Very brief ending.
You don't need to have a big overbearing problem.
It could be a slice of life story. Also useful as a refresher.
If you really need a problem: Describe Dave and Davos struggles to keep sane in this mad new world.
Or how they try to keep away from the news people.
Ian Birchenough: pic#125528716Ian Birchenough on October 3rd, 2017 02:16 pm (UTC)
Are there any other 'occupied' bags they collect during Earl's roadtrip?
matapampamuphoff on October 3rd, 2017 02:39 pm (UTC)
I think I'll quit there . . . unless I have a better idea.

The trick is to never commit too far ahead, so you keep plot options open.
Michawl DolbearMichawl Dolbear on October 3rd, 2017 03:36 pm (UTC)
Most soaps are written to minimise permanent changes (except 'killing' departing actors or sending them to Australia).

If Mirror Mirror and Scramble (or Not Fallen I suppose) become canon this affects everything onwards including the return of Old Nick who might regard fixing Nuked One as an urgent task but fixing Emre's One or both Earths as a long term matter (Thousand Year Plan)


Mike D
Little Egret in Walton-on-Thames
matapampamuphoff on October 3rd, 2017 07:32 pm (UTC)
Keep in mind that Nuked One will have their own Lucky Dave dragging himself and the bag away from the lost battleground.

And, umm,Poe has "fixed" them pretty damn well.

Except he hasn't. Yet.

_Children of a Foreign God_ will be in 1408 yp.
_Lucky Dave_ the following summer of 1409 yp.
_One Love_ Ebsa and Paers wedding story in 1410 during the presidential election.
That puts _Scrambled_ in the summer of 1411 yp with their twins being born between Ebsa's battle and then his rescues of marooned peoples.

So by the time after Scrambled that Ra'd realizes their will be another LD/D/N on Nuked One, His LD/D/N will have had a couple of years to adapt to the future.

Heh. I could have Lucky Dave decide that he ought to be the one to go find his other self, since he isn't a wanted criminal on Nuked One. All he needs is a dimensionally talented witch . . . And no, absolutely not that teenage menace. An actual, you know, adult witch would be nice . . .
ekuah on October 3rd, 2017 09:45 pm (UTC)
Is Wavelength dimensional able?
matapampamuphoff on October 3rd, 2017 10:15 pm (UTC)
Yep. And she is driven to explore all the oddball unusual worlds. Somewhere among all possible worlds is one with space aliens. Dragon Girl in Spaaaaace!

But Lucky Dave's new friends, the Speed Team, will no doubt introduce him to the witches they worked with.
Michawl DolbearMichawl Dolbear on October 4th, 2017 09:27 pm (UTC)
I look forward to your rewrite of the Conclave of the Clans being addressed by both Emre and Nicolas.

And the story of Ajha as Philosopher of the One will be quite different, if it happens at all.
matapampamuphoff on October 4th, 2017 10:22 pm (UTC)
Cannibal World 1403 yp

Trouble in Paradise 1403 yp fall-spring

No Confidence 1404 winter-spring

Star Struck 1404 winter/spring

Pure Poison 1404 spring

Flying 1404 spring

First Assignment 1404 yp spring-summer

Surveillance Camp 1404 late summer?

Fort Dinosaur 1404 late summer-fall

Shadow Zone 1405 Rajab (May)

The Last Merge 1404 fall-1405

Eighteen months of raids to recover Oners

Black Point Clan 1407 yp late winter

Project Dystopia 1408 yp early spring-summer

External Relations 1408 yp late spring

Fractured Loyalties 1408

Children of a Foreign God 1408 yp

The Boy 1408 Ramadan

Gods and Princesses 1408 yp fall

Lucky Dave 1409

Wedding Bells 1410 yp

Scrambled 1411 yp



matapampamuphoff on October 4th, 2017 10:37 pm (UTC)
Lucky Dave, and all the changes that brings will be quite late in the saga.
matapampamuphoff on October 4th, 2017 10:43 pm (UTC)
_Shadow Zone_ AKA _Rescue Mission_ will be published this month.

I doubt I can finish _The Last Merge_ AKA _Gate Team_ in time to publish it as soon as I'd like, but it needs to come next.

Then the next four will only need a little rewriting to follow on quickly.

I'd also like to get Eldon's _Nowhere Man_ out in the next six months.
matapampamuphoff on October 5th, 2017 02:49 am (UTC)
"Wait, 3000 plus over-aged egotists have been arguing over a stupid _label_ to stick on themselves? For how long? Jesus H. Christ!

"And what kind of a designation is 'Oner' anyway? 'With, Near, Close, and Serve? What does it mean?

"And the priests! Good thing Emre woke all the way up and put a stop to what they were doing to children. Utterly horrifying.

"Bloody Hell. I think I'll just retire and make wine like Wolfgang and to hell with these modern la-di-dah high society idiots!"
mbarkermbarker on October 4th, 2017 01:45 am (UTC)
Thinking about it... the Fallen have the collective subconscious, which seems quite powerful, even if not under anyone's intentional control, while the Oners have the One. Nick obviously brings in a perspective from the founding -- I suspect that "talking down" of Emre's kooks is going to be a bit more feisty than this ending suggests. And will the rest of the Oners, the Princesses and Priests and such, get swept up in the battle to decide how this will go? We've seen the Philosophers cause havoc -- what happens when one of the Prophets is resurrected (well, that's the closest to Nick coming out of the bag). Could Rael and Ryol and Lucky Dave and company end up helping Nick break up the lockstep One of Emre and company? As ... looms in the background? Dun, dahdah, dun...
(Anonymous) on October 4th, 2017 06:19 pm (UTC)
Yeah the unpublished status of Scrambled made me wonder on that. Although my first thought was Nick recruiting his "sister-in-law" Nighthawk to search, as soon as he heard about the possibility. Maybe with Zog providing a known governmentally connected witness. And Poe quite happy to help since obviously like son like dad means Nick Sr. would be another big poke at the remaining stability of that worlds Hivemind.